Okay, I'm REALLY, REALLY SORRY that I haven't blogged anything in about a month and a half. If it makes you feel any better, I feel somewhat bad about it. Just a little.
Mostly, it's the result of how I've been really, really busy. This semester I am taking 17 credit hours including 8 classes. It didn't sound like much on paper for some reason, so I didn't think my semester would be too out of the ordinary, especially because a lot of these classes are electives and rumor has it you're supposed to be able to relax a little your senior year and blah blah blah...
Well those were filthy, rotten lies! Even before the play (which I'm going to talk about shortly), I was up to my ears in homework, real work, classes, clubs, etc. It sounds like I'm complaining, but it actually felt really good to be so busy. And now, as many probably know, I have been blessed with the privilege of working with professional actor (and, okay, kind of one of my childhood TV heroes) Clarence Gilyard
(^this guy)
on Bethel's fall drama, "The Diary of Anne Frank."
And when I say blessed, I really mean it. I don't remember what I was expecting, exactly, when I auditioned. Subconsciously, I don't think I thought I would make it. The whole audition process was very intimidating this time around because we were asked to prepare two one-minute monologues and a sixteen-bar song, the callbacks lasted over four hours, and...oh yeah...the director was on Walker, Texas Ranger. I'd done music auditions, I'd done monologue auditions; but I'd never had an audition ask for more than one monologue and a song on top of that, and I'd certainly never auditioned in front of someone I grew up watching on TV. I remember standing outside the audition room as I was "on deck" to audition--I hadn't yet met Professor Gilyard and had no idea what to expect--talking to A.J. (friend, ASM and "dramaturgy extraordinaire") and trying to calm myself down. I'd been supernaturally calm that whole day (thanks to the many who were praying for me), but the nerves really hit me right before I went in. "He's just a guy, right, A.J.?" I asked. "He's just a guy," he confirmed. When the door opened up, I took a breath and just walked. I acted confident and did my monologues, sang my song, succeeded in not making a fool of myself (yet) in front of Professor Gilyard, even succeeded in making him laugh once. I felt good, and I felt even better when I got the callback. When I saw my name on the cast list next to "Mrs. van Daan" that Friday, I just about had a heart attack. The thought that Professor Gilyard saw something in me that was worthy of being onstage was so beyond me, and I couldn't stop smiling and answering text messages in all caps.
Then rehearsals started, and I sobered up. At our first rehearsal (the very Friday we were cast), Professor Gilyard told us that oftentimes when he was cast, he immediately thought to himself, "What have I gotten myself into?" I was hit with a heavy dose of that after our first readthrough of the show, and continue to be hit with it almost daily now. This show is unlike anything I've ever been a part of. It's easily the hardest thing project I've ever been involved in. Four hours per day six days a week, the fourteen of us transition into the Annex, into the dreadful circumstances the Frank and van Pels (van Daan) families and Mr. Dussel faced, into the danger Miep and Mr. Kraler faced in aiding them. It is incredibly difficult. I would honestly argue that transitioning back into real life in 2013 and going back to my campus apartment full of giggling girls is a lot harder. The immense amount of research we have to do, the homework, the line memorization, the lessons on acting in such a way that I'm not really acting, the focus it takes to remember that I'm barely Christen anymore but almost entirely Mrs. van Daan...it absolutely wears me out. And I adore it.
I still look back on that moment around 8:00 am on that Friday morning when I opened the e-mail attachment with the cast list and saw my name on the list, and I feel that rush of giddiness again. I remember the audition process and how throughout it I felt the prayers of people who were on my side, I felt that Jesus-y peace about everything I was pouring into the audition, I felt very much like Professor Gilyard saw me. Most of all I think about the amazing opportunity this is and how I still can't believe it was granted to me...and I just can't believe I'm here. I don't have to do this; I get to do it. I didn't have to go through with the audition when I found out how intimidating it would be. I didn't have to accept the role. This is my pleasure, my joy.
So people keep asking me how rehearsals are going, which I really appreciate because I love talking about it and because, again, I still can't believe I get to do this. My usual response is something along the lines of, "It's great! It's really intense, but really good." I keep it to a few sentences like this because I could go on for a while and most people...well...let's let Sweet Brown say it instead.
So I thought I'd take this opportunity to elaborate a bit on some of the aspects of this show. It has been a pleasure thus far to step into the Annex and watch this story come alive. Hope you enjoy!
10 Things I have to say about this production of "The Diary of Anne Frank"
- "Clarence Gilyard is..." A lot of people--including himself--describe him as "intense," and they're all correct. He's very passionate about this play and he expects his actors to take it seriously. He also expects a lot out of his actors, but he makes sure we know it's because he knows we're capable of it. It's so amazing to have a professional actor believe in you. Yes, he's stern. He will make you go through a sequence of lines a million times until you get it just right, and he'll expect you to do it even better from that point on. But when you do get it right, he is so excited. "YES!" he'll exclaim. "THAT'S IT! EVERYBODY GIVE ______ A HAND!" He is indeed intense, but it is never without purpose. Personally, I really appreciate having a professor who challenges me this much.
- It's really cool to see your professor on TV. I was working at the Acorn the other afternoon and, of all things, Walker, Texas Ranger was on one of the TVs. Every time Ranger Trivette (see first photo) popped up on the screen, I squealed like a kid and exclaimed, "Hey guys! That's my professor!!!" to whoever happened to be in the line at the time. I mean, it's one thing when a professor gets interviewed for the evening news and you see him once for about ten seconds. It's another when he's got a principal role in multiple TV shows and movies. I've been pretty good about not acting like a crazed fangirl around Professor Gilyard, mostly because during rehearsal I tend to forget that he's famous. But every so often, I remember it and things like this happen. I told him that evening, "Hey, I saw you at the Acorn today...because Walker was on TV." He laughed and said, "Yeah? Was I kicking somebody's butt?!" I love it.
- We have the greatest cast. The fourteen-ish actors we have in our cast ranged anywhere from "oh yeah, I love that person!" to "I don't think I've ever seen that person in my life." At this point, they have all easily moved to the first category. I think the size of the cast and the heaviness of the play knits us even closer together, and I'm so happy I get to work with the group we have. I also really think the actors were perfectly selected for their roles. Oh, which reminds me...
- It is so amazing to watch the cast come alive in their characters. Professor Gilyard has been working us really hard on making ourselves believable in our characters--which goes back to the whole "acting without looking like we're acting" thing I mentioned briefly before. It's interesting because a lot of the actors are no strangers to the Bethel stage, so you might have an idea what to expect when you see them act. But let me just say, you won't even recognize your friends and colleagues anymore. During rehearsal, I frequently forget we're in a play and that the characters are really actors I've known for years. Elaina (stage manager extraordinaire) will call "Okay, guys, take five!" and I'm all surprised because here I thought we didn't get to leave the Annex. This goes for outside of rehearsal as well; people ask how the show's coming along and I'm like, "Oh yeah...it's a show." Maybe the fact that it once was real life makes it more believable, but I know the acting has made it a lot more possible.
- We legitimately spend one full day per week in rehearsal. I don't do much math, but I know that four (hours per day) times six (days per week) equals twenty-four (hours in a day). Typically, Bethel shows require about three hours per night and only five days a week. The extra hour per day and day per week definitely make a difference. This is amazing to me. We're a little less than halfway through the rehearsal process and we are "officially" off book now. So with three more weeks of rehearsal--twenty-four hours per week--I just can't wait to see where the show will end up. It is a big time commitment to be involved in this show, but it's also really amazing to be able to put this much time into it. It's going to help the show out a lot.
- We have the greatest stage managers. Elaina (stage manager) and A.J. (assistant stage manager and dramaturge (oh, and I totally don't know the rules for when to use dramaturge/dramaturg/dramaturgy, so I'm super sorry if an error is made)) are the perfect team for the cast to work with on this show. My top three reasons for this (but surely not the only reasons) are: (A) they're both left-handed, (B) they're both gingers, and (C) they coordinate their clothes without even meaning to:Plus they offer the correct ratio of whip-cracking and chillness needed for this show. So much win.
- Assignments with A.J. Since this is a very historically-significant play, the cast partakes in frequent history lessons with our dramaturgy (see aforementioned disclaimer on usage of this word) A.J. This week we had to read through the 613 Mitzvot (commandments) of Judaism and come up with questions about specific laws. (Let me just say I never want to hear another Christian complain about having to memorize the 10 Commandments. That's totally not allowed anymore.) It's a lot of work, but it's very helpful to immerse ourselves in the circumstances of our characters. Sometimes it's tough because of the subject matter--honestly, I have a really hard time taking in that much information about the concentration camps and what went on there. But it is necessary to realize what was at stake for those in the Annex to be able to do this story any justice.
- This is more than just a play. It is a story that needs to be told. It is heavy stuff, but it is the kind of stuff that could change lives. We never know who might be in the audience and what it might mean to them. This is a very important play because it really happened, because we see history unfolding before us.
- It wasn't all gloom. You will laugh, too. There are some seriously funny moments in this play, and a lot of them are funny because they portray real life and we can so easily relate. There are a lot of moments during rehearsal when we have to work on not laughing at someone else's line, or when we need to pause for a moment to get all the laughs out at something happening onstage. For me, this is the beauty of the play--seeing that it wasn't two years of pure misery and gloom. Those things had their place, for sure, but there were also good times to be had. Maybe not many, but they were there. You will see them.
- You need to see it. Really, guys. We open on October 31 (THIS MONTH!). If there is one show you don't want to miss, it's this one. I think you will understand why once you've seen it. Words aren't quite enough to describe it. Tickets are going to sell fast, and you can get them here or call the ticket office (the number of which is on that page). You'll want to get them soon. Believe me, it's worth it.
*Bonus list item: My parents rock, because they have been praying for me and supporting me so diligently throughout this process. I so look forward to the times I get to call them and tell them what went on in rehearsal the day before, and I really can't wait for them to see this play.
So now you have a little more info than I've been able to give you previously! My apologies in advance if you don't hear a lot from me in the coming weeks as things will only get busier as the show draws near. I'll do my best to keep you posted on life, and I thank you for caring and reading. Y'all rock.
